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Me and My Shadow

By:  Donna Martin

Ephesians 5:1-2  “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” (NIV)

People have fun with shadows – making silly characters, trying to step on one another’s shadows, changing positions in the light to make a shadow taller or shorter.  Our shadows follow us wherever we go and imitate all we do.

Children are shadows of their parents.  When they are small they follow their parents almost everywhere and every moment.  As they grow older they tend to physically follow parents less, however they still “shadow” the behavior they learned from their parents.  Have you ever noticed how a teenage son walks like his dad and a daughter laughs or smiles like her mother?

When you listen to children play you can learn very much about their home.  Their actions and the phrases they speak mimic what they have observed from Mom and Dad.  What a responsibility this puts on us as parents and grandparents.  Maybe we should stop and notice what behavior and words our children have picked up from us.

How are you treating your spouse?  Are you critical and impatient?  Do you nag and complain?  Do you crush your spouse’s spirit with your negative words? Are you discontent with what you have? Or do you say words of encouragement that build up your spouse?  Do you show respect and love?  Does your voice show kindness?  Are you content with and thankful for what you have?

If your children see and hear you being disrespectful to your spouse they will “shadow” that behavior both by being disrespect to your spouse in your home now.  Then they will continue that behavior with their own spouse when they marry.

Make sure that you imitate Christ in your behavior at home and give your spouse the same love and respect that you give your boss, secretary, and friends.

Your shadow follows you everywhere and does just what you do.  The only way you can control your shadow is by turning off the light or changing your actions.  It is dangerous to live the in dark, so let the light of Jesus light your way and be imitators of Christ not only at church and work, but also in your home, with your children and with your spouse.

The Martins currently present “Happy Together” marriage seminars for churches and organizations.  To schedule a seminar call Michael at 940-735-1515. They also publish a weekly “Happy Together” Blog about family and marriage issues.  You can order copies of their new books Dancing With Death and 366 Tidbits We Have Learned in 14,610 Days of Marriage, and read and subscribe to their “Happy Together” Blog by logging onto the Martin’s website at

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