Missing Manners

By:  Donna Martin

Is it just me or are more and more people forgetting their manners these days?  It seems that people are so concerned about themselves and their own needs that they forget about being kind, considerate, polite, thankful, and helpful.  Children talk disrespectfully to their parents and teachers; drivers cut in front of other drivers or fail to let people into the line of traffic.  Diners are rude to waiters and waiters are rude to diners.  Cursing is overlooked and expletives flow from the mouths of not only men but also women and children.   People fail to say please and thank you.  Everyone is out for their own well being.  People are too busy and too self absorbed to do kind things for others.  The entitlement mentality exists from preschoolers to senior citizens.   Everyone is always on their phone, and too obsessed with virtual conversations to pause for a real conversation with friends and family members. 

Does the Bible have anything to say about manners?  I think it does.

Titus 3:1-3 says, “Remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, ² to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.” (ESV)

Luke 6:31 says, “And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.” (ESV)

Leviticus 19:32 says, “You shall stand up before the gray head and honor the face of an old man, and you shall fear your God:  I am the Lord.” (ESV)

Ephesians 6:2 says, “Honor your father and mother.”  (NIV)

Romans 12:10 says, “Love one another with brotherly affection.  Outdo one another in showing honor.”  (ESV)

Philippians 2:23 says, “Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” (ESV)

Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” (ESV)

Exodus 20:7 says, “You shall not misuse the name of the Lord your God.” (NIV)

1 Corinthians 13:4-5 says, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.  It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful.”  (ESV)

1 Corinthians 15:33 says, “Do not be deceived:  Bad company ruins good morals.” (ESV)

1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”  (ESV)

Teaching our children to be kind, thankful, respectful, and polite not only helps them to get along better with people, but it also helps them to feel better about themselves.  More importantly when they mind their manners they are being more Christ like.  Being polite is not a sign of weakness.  It is a sign of strength and character.  In this crass and rude world it is more important than ever to teach our children to mind their manners.  And it begins by being a good example and minding your manners in front of them.

The Martins currently present “Happy Together” Marriage Enrichment Events for churches and organizations.  To schedule an event call Michael at 940-735-1515.  They are certified “Prepare/Enrich” Facilitators and are available to work with couples on an individual basis using the “Prepare/Enrich Assessment.”  They publish a weekly “Happy Together” Blog about family and marriage issues.  You can order copies of their new books Dancing With Death and 366 Tidbits We Have Learned in 14,610 Days of Marriage, read and subscribe to their “Happy Together” Blog by logging onto the Martin’s website at www.happytogethermarriage.com.